Parenting angst commissioned by God

I read through Judges today and felt a pang for Manoah, father of Samson. When his wife informed him that a man told her she would become pregnant and not to partake of anything grapey, he thought as any man would, "Who's this guy talking to my wife? Is this legit, or is he just trying to cuckold me?"

Actually, the text tells us that Manoah prayed, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I beg you to let the man of God you sent to us come again to teach us how to bring up the boy who is to be born.” I hear a little bit of Gideon lurking just beneath the surface: "Can I really be sure . . .?" But I love that this is Manoah's prayer. My biggest issue with becoming a parent (now times two) is that I may not tell the story of God well. I could really use some help in communicating a big-read, nonversejack, here's-the-big-story-that-makes-little-to-no-sense-in-America story. But I digress.

Manoah obviously takes his job seriously. He wants to be sure how to bring up a Nazirite, and perhaps more simply, any child, in such a rotten society. And if we think parenting is about us or making sure our kids turn out well, this event from later in the story will shatter that expectation:

Samson went down to Timnah and saw there a young Philistine woman. When he returned, he said to his father and mother, “I have seen a Philistine woman in Timnah; now get her for me as my wife.” His father and mother replied, “Isn’t there an acceptable woman among your relatives or among all our people? Must you go to the uncircumcised Philistines to get a wife?” But Samson said to his father, “Get her for me. She’s the right one for me.” (His parents did not know that this was from YHWH, who was seeking an occasion to confront the Philistines; for at that time they were ruling over Israel.)

First, how does a parent argue with "She's the right one for me"? If they do, the reply will be "You don't know me! You don't own me!" And there will be instant alienation, if that hadn't happened already.

And does God really answer the prayers of some parents who are desperate to raise good kids with a rebellious teen? Like specifically answer with that? I'm starting to think that's possible, more often than we think. The God of Israel that we claim to love and serve isn't capricious like other gods, but he sure has his own ideas.