Respectfully shocked and a little creeped out

My wife's soul mother (alma mater for those of you keeping score at home) had an alumni dinner in our town tonight, so we went and had an amazing meal for a relatively small price. I had the country fried steak which was fabulous. Given the onset of chubease (the word that just made itself up for how easily I put on weight), I limited myself to one half slab of said steak. The awesome thing was, they gave each of us two slabs. I see at least two more meals in my future, which is very exciting.

Since it was an alumni and fundraising dinner, we got to hear their advancement (development/fundraising) pitch. Now this is the thing. This is a small-to-medium-sized Midwestern Bible college. For those who know, this means pretty fundamentalist. My family was involved in this school in various ways over the years, so I spent time on campus. I was raised in such a way that I believed the party line straight and narrow. I drank deeply of this milieu. Interestingly, I went to Moody Bible Institute, a school that was probably a bit liberal for the tastes of many of the more conservative Bible college folk. (They spoke respectfully of Moody tonight.)

After leaving Chicago, I fell off the wagon. I stopped versejacking. I stopped believing in strict literality (particularly of little nibbles of Bible-y bits). I started believing in—not merely acknowledging the existence of, but actually practicing—the idea of context. Perhaps most importantly, I started believing the Bible when it says that the current heavens and earth will be recreated into a new heavens and new earth. (Note that these are the primordial Greek gods—Ouranos and Gaia—though they would be ouranoi and ge, plural and singular in the NT rather than both singular.)

It blew my mind and simultaneously made me cringe when I heard one of the representatives talking about a personal evangelism incident from the past summer. The man and his wife are building a house. The man was talking with the guy who excavated their lot. The excavator commented that he had an absolutely beautiful lot. The man said, "You know what? This is all going to go away [maybe he said burn, I don't remember]. But there is going to be one thing left. Do you know what it is?" The excavator looked at him and said, "You got me. The sky?" (Interjectory comment from narrator: "You're not too far off, buddy!") "No. You and me. The question is where you will be when everything else is gone."

Eventually, the excavator became a Christian (I have a really hard time typing that word in this instance), and the man's son, who led excavator to the faith, promptly gave him a Ryrie Study Bible. Double cringe. Let's be sure to teach Newbie to never read the Bible in a way that he can understand it!

The subtext of the entire evening was, "We teach students to live with a biblical worldview. We don't compromise our doctrine. It's so important that they have this foundation. We teach the fundamentals. That world out there is a poisonous place." (I guess I won't argue with that last assertion.) I'm not sure who they were trying to convince. All the people there were alumni or family. Why keep harping? Do more alumni dollars come in for each assurance?

Another sad moment was after they had asserted in the new "Marketing Video" (different name, guys?) that they welcome students with open arms and everyone is family. A prospective student asked what the turnaway rate was for applicants. They only turn applicants away if their GPA is too low (which they can actively remediate in community college, and be welcomed immediately) or if their doctrine doesn't measure up. So . . . you mean you're not actually welcoming. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to show love or Jesus or something to these aberrant students to help them come to the truth? No? They might poison the student body? Seriously.

All of this actually brought me back to the poisonous atmosphere of my roots. I still struggle with being RIGHT, even though my beliefs have swung round to what I believe to be biblical beliefs. The major heritage of that upbringing I still struggle with is the fact that I assume I am right, and everyone else is wrong. I say that I believe I need to hear voices other than my own, or else I will perish in my own myopic stubbornness. But practically, I still insist that I am right.

I have to say, I had a very enjoyable time talking to several people at the table. They are dear and fun folks, that I would love to spend more time with. They have fun stories and insights. But I couldn't believe the shock of being dunked back in my old thoughts and two and a half hours later being pulled right back out. It reminds me of how far I've come, but also how far I have to go.